#2: Expectations

In Accounting they taught you to always “under-promise and over-deliver”, and I found that this has to be one of the best lessons I could draw from my lectures. If you had over-promised, an audit would reveal your actual performance for the financial year and this may be considered an ethical issue because the shareholders would be harmed. Under-performing would disappoint the shareholders as they had been guaranteed to expect higher returns. Why, you ask, do I find this lesson useful? Well, I suppose it is because this may be applied to our lives as well.

Under-promise and over-deliver. That statement speaks for itself. If what you promised was way beyond what you actually delivered in the end, people will end up disappointed as you crush their hopes and expectations of you. However, if you delivered above what you had promised, then the level of satisfaction would increase as people had lower expectations. This is basically common sense. And if you have been reading this until so far, you probably would also feel a little bit disappointed that you’re getting nothing out of this.

So let’s take all this into another perspective. Let’s step into someone else’s shoes. Have you ever had people looking at you as if they expect so much from you, and then even after trying so hard, you failed to meet that expectation, and then that gaze just changes…it transforms into a look of disgust, of criticism, of distrust, of being belittled, of being looked down upon. Now that, is the look of disappointment. It’s like being towered over by a giant who holds up one finger, saying “Shame on you”. Or travelling to your ancestral country not knowing the language. Or going back to childhood and have your parent smack you or something. Well not necessarily like those illustrations, but you know what I mean.

I know that being disappointed by someone simply feels…disappointing, but trust me, the feeling of being a disappointment is worse. So don’t always demand for more. Don’t criticise, don’t judge. Don’t over-expect. And you won’t be disappointed. Better yet, you would help get people out of the misery of feeling sorry for themselves.

With love,

Thalia ❤💋

#1: Change

Heyyy! It's 2016 already so Happy new year everyone!!! Better late than never, okay? I know it’s been a while that I’ve posted anything. A lot has been going on and I haven’t had time to write properly, so I decided not to post any up here. Btw I’m on my break now, WOHOOO!!! So I renew my blog and promise I will be writing more regularly. Hopefully...

But anyway. The reason why I decided to write this is because I feel  free, NO! Maybe because I feel bored, NO! But because I feel that I need to. Okayy... I want to talk about change, because I was changed a lot. But first of all, FORGIVE my terrible grammar:(

Change is inevitable, so I have been told. It is the only thing that remains constant, because as people, we are continuously moulded by the situations that we face, shaped by the people that we meet and formed by the conditions that we are placed in. Change must happen and will happen, for a particular reason. For us to adapt. To survive natural selection.

An easy example would be growing up. When we were young we used to be all clingy and adorable, seeking our parents’ attention and affection all the time. I mean, which kid does not want to be tucked into bed at night? To be kissed on the bump on the head to be all better? To be carried around because “I’m too tired”? And as we grow, we would give anything (and I do mean anything) for some privacy. What happened then? What caused that gap to widen and us teenagers to want to be given a distance? Change is what happened. We adapt to be able to feel independent and so that we won’t be embarrassed.

But have you ever thought about how your parents would feel about your sudden change in attitude? Have you ever thought about how other people felt about how you changed? How do you feel about change? Honestly, personally I am afraid of changes. Maybe terrified is an even better word to describe it. But what is it about change that we tend to fear?

If someone has changed for the worse, you have every right to fear change. But if a person changed for the better, people would still be scared. Scared for and of the many reasons why. People are afraid of not knowing, of being kept in the dark. And the thing with change is that it is unpredictable and you will never know and understand exactly how and why it happened. People are afraid of the hidden agendas and motives that might not be as plain and sincere as good change may seem. People are suspicious about good change.

Nonetheless, I believe that people can change. Even for the better. Despite their intentions on either wanting to look good or to get something that they want, I believe that if they put up with their act long enough, they will start believing in them and soon will really change. Otherwise, the truth will get out eventually, right?

Have a nice day xxx

With love,

Thalia ❤💋